I Am Second, Are You?
December 8, 2008
Have you seen the new website creeping up - iamsecond.com? It’s quite insightful.
Anyway, Pete Briscoe, Pastor of Bent Tree Fellowship in Texas, shares a bit of his testimony that I think is great for Pastors to hear. It’s only a few minutes, but may shake you deep inside.
A Video Tell-All On Us Pastors?
November 29, 2008
ht: Anne Jackson
Distractions Extraordinaire
October 1, 2008
You don’t have to be in ministry to know both the rush and frustration of distractions. We want to know how we can avoid them, when the truth is that we can’t. Tasks we haven’t thought of, crises that we didn’t anticipate and disasters that no one could ever predict come upon us. They just do. Let alone the distractions we allow for one reason or another.
I am an email fiend if there ever was one, love Twitter, and think you should follow me for the fun of it. At the same time, I try to have some semblance of availability as a Pastor that doesn’t border on or cross the line of neuroticism. There are some distractions that are controllable, if we so choose. I know I must work at limiting them for the good of my own soul.
Thanks to my friend, Bob Hyatt, I quote Ruth Haley Barton, from her book, Sacred Rhythms, as follows:
“It’s not that I am averse to technology; I too have a cell phone, an office phone, a home phone and an email address, and they are much needed. However, I am aware of longings that run much deeper than what technology can address. I am noticing that the more I fill my life with the convenience of technology, the emptier I become in the places of my deepest longing. I long for the beauty and substance of being in the presence of those I love, even though it is less convenient. I long for spacious, thoughtful conversation even though it is less efficient. I long to be connected with my authentic self, even though it means being inaccessible to others at time. I long to be one who waits and listens deeply for the still, small voice of God, even if it means I must unplug from technology in order to become quiet enough to hear.
Constant noise, interruption and drivenness to be more productive cut us off from or at least interrupt the direct experience of God and other human beings, and this is more isolating than we realize. Because we are experiencing less meaningful and divine connection, we are emptier relationally, and we try harder and harder to fill that loneliness with even more noise and stimulation. In so doing we lose touch with the quieter and more subtler experiences of God within.
This is a vicious cycle indeed.”
Well said, don’t you think? If you’re NOT thinking about it or can’t grasp it, therein may lie the problem of which we speak. Just a thought!
Feast or Famine
September 1, 2008
I’m one of those Pastors who happens to live on “church property”. We live in the parsonage right next door to the church. Fortunately, the front of my house faces AWAY from the church, and my leadership at the church saw the wisdom a few years ago of adding a couple layers of block on top of the back wall. Now, I don’t have to observe and wonder about work every time I’m in my back yard.
For us, it’s been by and large a good experience to live where we do. However, that hasn’t always been true, nor is it always true today.
Reflecting on my calendar this Summer, I realized some circumstances kept me from taking the kind of time away that I am used to. My oldest son, now 13, had some surgery on a leg that was necessary and very successful, but resulted in the need for lots of down time. He’s our :komebody”, so he felt most comfortable just staying home.
My wife, Colleen, begins a new job this week as a Teacher at our local Adult school. She has been feverishly preparing for this new role, and didn’t feel free to take much time away over the last couple months.
We finally got away for almost a week just a couple of weeks ago. It was wonderful, refreshing, and caused me to once again see the need for regular time away. Not just vacation time, but time to get away to be with Jesus, letting Him quiet my soul and lead me to His rest.
The last couple of days, Colleen and I have been working out our Fall calendar. I saw a window of opportunity to get away with her and the boys, but didn’t say anything. However, then I read a friend’s blog post.
I want to share it with you, and by doing so, introduce you to Jan Owens. Read her blog post on getting away here, click here to read her story, and click here to subscribe to her blog in a reader. You will be glad you did! We have not met personally, but I really appreciate her vulnerability and perspective on life in God as a Church Leader.
If it’s been a while since you’ve gotten away to refocus and be refreshed, I know Jan would join me in encouraging you to get your calendar out right now. Look over the next weeks and months. DO NOT CLOSE THAT CALENDAR until you’ve pencilied in at least a time or two away from the grind before the holidays hit!
When Ministry Is Killing You
August 18, 2008
Who said it? What was meant by it? Did they really even know what they were saying?
Somewhere, somehow, we ‘ve lost sight of the things that truly matter and set our sights on some things that don’t. As a result, the very thing we got into this line of “work” for is the very thing that is sucking the life out of us ….. “reaching people”.
At least that’s what we want to believe. That we are in it to reach people. Somewhere, deep down inside, it really is true. But somewhere, even deeper down inside, it’s also true that the definition of whether or not people are being reached (”How’s the Church? Is it growing? Are people getting saved? Are you building? What’s your budget?”) has side tracked us. It’s putting us in danger of losing who God really has made and is making us to BE for the sake of how much we can DO for Him.
I don’t know about you, but my heart resonates with this article from Out of Ur….
Great is Thy Effectiveness?
There’s danger in rooting our identity in ministry rather than in Christ.
Something’s wrong. We pastors are the stewards, the spokespeople, the advocates of a message of hope, life, and peace. And yet so few of us seem to be experiencing these qualities in our own lives. Something’s wrong. In a world saturated with fear, insecurity, and stress, we are to show a different way. And yet those at the center of the church are burning out and leaving ministry at a rate of 1,500 per month. If that’s what’s occurring at the heart of the church, why would anyone on the fringe want to move in closer?
I’ve just read an article by two Christian counselors about the soul-killing impact of church ministry on leaders. (The statistic above comes from them.) They note that the pressure to grow the church is a significant factor leading to pastoral burn out. And some pastors “admitted they promoted growth models that were incongruent with their values because of a desperate need to validate their pastoral leadership.” It seems too many of us have our identities wrapped up in the measurable outcomes of our work rather than in the life-giving love of the Christ we proclaim. Something’s wrong.
I spent last week in western Iowa and met many wonderful pastors and church leaders. These men and women don’t lead megachurches. They’re not in chic urban or suburban communities where new cultural trends are born. In other words, they’re not the people you’re likely to see on the platform at a ministry conference. More than one church leader approached me during the week holding back tears. Each confessed he was on the verge of mental/spiritual/emotional collapse. The cause sited by all: the pressure to perform.
Some might say these leaders have failed to nurture their souls sufficiently. We usually want to blame leaders for their own burn out, but when I see the pervasiveness of this problem I wonder if there isn’t also a systemic factor. Could contemporary church ministry itself be the problem?
When I peruse ministry books, websites, magazines, and attend conferences I’m bombarded with one overwhelming message: great ministry results are the product of great ministry leadership. If a church is growing, if lives are changing, if budgets are burgeoning—it must be because the leader is doing something right. Conversely, if the church is shrinking, if lives are struggling, if budgets are busting—it must be because the leader is inept. As a result, a pastor’s success and self-worth is inexorably linked to his/her measurable performance. Stewing in this toxic brew is it any wonder why pastors’ souls are shriveling. Something’s wrong.
Consider a chapter titled “Bigger is Better” from a popular ministry book. The authors write, “A church should always be bigger than it was. It should be constantly growing.” Talk about pressure. The problem is this standard doesn’t hold water when applied to Jesus himself. John 6 describes the scene where “many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him.” After teaching some weird stuff about drinking his blood and eating his flesh, the crowds who were drawn by Jesus’ miracles decided they had had enough. Did Jesus’ shrinking ministry mean he was an ineffective leader? Why do we hold ourselves to a standard that Jesus’ doesn’t apply to himself?
Or consider one of my favorite stories from the Old Testament. In Numbers 20, Moses performs a miracle by drawing water from a rock to nourish the Israelites. By any human measure Moses’ ministry was a success. It was God-empowered (he performed a miracle), and it was relevant (the people were thirsty). If Moses lived today, we’d all be reading his ministry book titled, “How to Draw Water from Rocks: Effective Strategies to Refresh Arid Churches.” There was just one problem—Moses’ effective ministry was rejected by God. Moses had disobeyed the Lord’s command by striking the rock rather than speaking to it. For this sin he was forbidden from entering the Promised Land. It turns out God performed a miracle in spite of Moses, not because of him.
Might God be doing the same thing today? Is God allowing some powerful, effective, and relevant ministries to grow in spite of leaders rather than because of them? If Scripture shows that faithful and godly leaders can have shrinking ministries (Jesus in John 6), and sinful leaders can have successful ministries (Moses in Numbers 20), then why do we persist in measuring our success simply on the measurable outcomes of our work?
Brothers and sisters, you are more than the measurable outcomes of your work. I’ve come back from my time in Iowa with a renewed commitment to help us all understand the mysterious calling we have in Christ. I want to be at least one voice countering the soul-killing noise surrounding church leaders today—noise that tries to convince us to ground our identities in effectiveness rather than faithfulness. Yes, we need to work diligently and serve Christ with our very best—this is our worship to God. But how we define success should look very different in the economy of God’s kingdom from the tangible stats the world celebrates.
I hope this is what distinguishes Leadership as a resource for you. Leadership is about skill, but it’s also about the soul. Some of us are called to plant, some of us are called to water. At Leadership we want to help pastors become better planters and better irrigators; but in the end, we also want to help you release the outcomes to God who causes the growth. Unlike contemporary business, ministry involves the baffling interplay of the human and the divine, the spiritual and the material. There is a mystery to what we are called to do. Embracing this mystery and releasing the outcomes of our work to God is what we must do if our lives, and not just our ministries, are to be filled with his grace.
Skye Jethani is the managing editor of Leadership and a teaching pastor at Blanchard Alliance Church in Wheaton, Illinois.
The Road To POP
August 15, 2008
Mike Foster …. can you make it any more clear than this? I mean, come on, I’m not quite sure I get what you’re saying 
. Maybe you (reading this) can help me understand. Then again, maybe Mike’s made this CLEAR ENOUGH!!!
I am hardcore about taking personal responsibility for managing our emotional, spiritual, physical, and relational health. Why? Because I believe every passion, mission, job, or ministry has a road leading to POP.
What’s POP? It’s where you have depleted everything in your life and you simply breakdown. Your job, company, organization, and leadership role has sucked you dry. Btw, the worst culprits: churches and ministries. You give EVERYTHING and then you have left yourself bare, vulnerable, and in a toxic place. And then you POP!
Sometimes POP looks like destructive escapism like alcohol, drugs, or porn.
Sometimes POP means running off with a hot young thing you met on the internet 2 weeks ago.
Sometimes it means going into a maniacal rage in some company meeting, jumping on top of the table, taking your clothes off, and getting jiggy with it.
Tragically, sometimes POP means suicide or a massive heart attack that kills you.
POP means bailing on your spouse and your kids so you can go “find” yourself…with some other guy/gal.
And then after a month of us “doing the crazy” we come back to our life with huge regrets and a big mess to start cleaning up. Sometimes and sadly, we are never the same.
The story isn’t rare. It’s actually pretty common.
I’ve realized hard wirings in me that would lead me to the POP scenario. If I didn’t manage my life well I could find my self blowing up and breaking down…and quite quickly. In a matter of months or a few bad weeks and…..POP!
Let me be clear here. I’m not alone on this road. You’re on it too. Some of you are aware of it and are working on it in your life. Others are completely blind to the forces that are working against you. And if I ever meet you, and I see you heading towards POP, I’m going to call you out on it.
I’m going to smack you down and warn you. And I don’t want to hear your excuses and valid reasons of why you HAVE to lead your life sucked dry. Pure crap! You just don’t have the balls to make the hard decisions in your personal life. And if I was in a POP scenario in my life, I would expect the same from you.
Every person is on the road leading to POP. I just hope all of us figure out how to live our lives so we never arrive at that final destination.
Thoughts?
Disconnecting Can Be A Good Thing!
August 14, 2008
Mark Batterson of National Community Church in Washington, DC, adds to the conversation regarding my concept of “regular guy” weekends. Thoughts?
I just wrote an article for Sermon Central titled The Adventurous Pastor.
Here’s an excerpt:
A few years ago I played hooky from church. Instead of going to our Saturday night services, my son and I hit the ski slopes. It was the last weekend of the ski season so it was our last chance to go after one of the life goals we share in common: learn to snowboard.
We were awfully sore at the end of the day. Especially my backside! But it was one of those unforgettable days. And there is one moment in particular that is frozen in my mind. Literally. We were riding up the chairlift as the blizzard-like snow was coming down. And I heard the still small voice of the Holy Spirit. I realized, in that moment on that chair lift, that my life had completely revolved around National Community Church for the better part of a decade. On one level, when you plant a church, you’ve got to pour your heart and soul into it. Sacrifices are par for the course. But I came to the convicting realization that I didn’t really have much of a life outside of church. It was as if the Holy Spirit said: Get a life!
I’m afraid that many pastors, if we were completely honest, would have to admit that we have no life outside of church–no hobbies, no relationships, no interests, no goals, no margins. And we wonder why we’re bored with ministry. So let me share a few ways to adventurize your life…
You can read the entire article here.
Your Personal Pace, Part 4
August 7, 2008
I don’t want to do this. I really don’t. But I must. It’s where the Lord has me right now, so I must address this part of anyone’s personal pace.
What do you do with your grief and loss? How does that impact your personal pace of life?
It used to be that when I experienced grief and loss, I did my best to “weep with those who” wept, but wouldn’t grieve much because we “don’t grieve as those who have no hope.” Both of those biblical quotes true and poignant …. and so easily misunderstood.
You see, like many of you, I’m a Pastor. Loss and grief is something my people face every day. Over the years, when you don’t have any grasp on what it means to be “blessed” to be someone who “mourns”, you tend to just pull up your boot straps and just move on.
Until, that is, you end up suffering a loss, or a spattering of losses that cause you to emotionally come to a grinding halt. A painful, yet powerful, lesson I’ve learned is that loss and grief must impact your personal pace. If it doesn’t, something’s wrong.
I don’t mean to sound brash or harsh, but having been one who thought others grieving should get over it and move on, I had to learn that if God grieves, so do I grieve. I can grieve now, as the losses occur, or I will grieve them later, more painfully, and maybe at greater cost to my own health.
I mentioned a few sentences back that this is where the Lord has me.
- Two church member funerals in two weeks
- Three funerals in a month
- A case of cancer gone wrong for one lady I pastor (after four surgical procedure in two months to remove masses, now they will do a full mastectomy)
- A staff member’s uncle who died suddenly this week
- My son, whose leg is fine and will be stronger, but who is missing much of his 13th Summer
- A Pastor in my city who hangs on the brink of life in an ICU after a massive brain hemorrhage 10 days ago
- A man I pastor who survived a quadruple bypass a few months back and was ready to go back to work right when the need for a pacemaker came into his picture.
I now realize that when I face loss and walk through it with the people I lead, it impacts my personal pace. If I don’t allow room for it, I pay for it later. What does it mean to “make room for it”? A few things:
- I cry when I feel like it.
- I slow down my schedule to account for the time spent with grieving friends and relatives.
- I admit to others that I don’t have all the answers.
- I do my best to give myself grace to not feel “on top of it” all the time.
This is a piece of personal pace that I don’t like, but I believe it’s a really important one. Is there anything you would add to the list of “make room” allowances?
Your Personal Pace, Part 3
July 30, 2008
In considering living at the pace of life God has given you, I believe it’s important to include your spiritual disciplines as well. Not in the “make sure you are disciplined spiritually” kind of “including”, but the “find your pace of spiritual disciplines” kind of “including”.
In other words, I think it’s a mistake to assume that because Korean Christians developed a habit of praying at 5:00 am for several hours, you ought to do that too. Brian Jones has a really, ummmm …. actually, I don’t know the right adjective to put on it, but he has a (let’s say) very interesting post here about the issue of how much we pray.
If a leader you admire and respect finds great success and deepening of relationship with God through journaling (ala Wayne Cordeiro), and if it helps you too, then great. Go for it! Just be careful about making it an “ought to” for the people around you.
If what works for you is to find several times a day for at least a few minutes each time to be with God like the ancient Christians did …. “Daily Offices” …. then by all means, have at it! Pete Scazzero believes this is a primary path to slowing down enough to truly connect with God. I personally find great merit in it. But I realize it doesn’t work for everyone.
What’s important for you as a Pastor is not that you spend hours a day reading your Bible, praying, fasting, and parsing the Greek. What is important is that you find the pace that works for you to truly connect with Jesus and His heart.
How many of us (too many, in truth) have “done the duties and disciplines” for the sake of saying we have done them, and yet still find ourselves falling to temptation and lacking transforming connection with our Creator?
What works for you? Be honest with all of us here. The pace you’re living your spiritual disciplines, is it REALLY working for you? Are you living it for Jesus, or for what others expect of you?
Living “Off Peak”
July 22, 2008
At first glance, one might think the title of this post a bit odd, and wonder what it has to do with living a fulfilling life as a Pastor. Well, one advantage of what we do is that our schedules are more flexible than the Monday-Friday, 9-5, clock-in, clock-out, desk routine.
That gives you and I the ability to live “off peak”. My friend, Nelson Searcy, who lives in probably the busiest city in America (read on to see), has some great insights on how to maximize this advantage. Click here to read more.
HT: Nelson Searcy
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