One Thing I Always Said Would Never Happen To Me

January 28, 2008

We all have things we observe happening in other people (especially leaders) that we quietly, and sometimes not so quietly, declare will never happen to us.

“I would never leave my wife for another woman!”
“I would never steal from the church!”
“I would never misuse my authority!”
“I would never … (fill in the blank)!”

My “never”? I would never BURN OUT! That is the one thing that would never happen to me for a number of well-considered reasons:

I think things through well and am very level-headed, calm, non-anxious.
I love to sleep, napping whenever I can and sleeping in at every opportunity.
I love my days off (when I take them).
I am not even sure burnout is real; maybe it’s just a lazy man’s way of getting out of work.

I could go on and on. Burnout was the one thing that would never happen to me. Until it did.

I couldn’t understand what they meant when they said they couldn’t focus or concentrate like they used to. They must be getting old or something. I’m only 35!

I had no comprehension (and probably even less compassion) when it came to hearing someone say they didn’t have the energy to get out of bed in the morning. THAT is laziness!

I was at a loss when some of the strongest people I knew in my church would sit in my office in a pool of tears that they couldn’t explain. They would try to describe how the emotions were out of control and they couldn’t keep from crying for no reason. Inside, I would think, “That’s just plain weird! You need some help, but I don’t think I can give it. Pull up your boot straps and move on!”

Not in my wildest or scariest dreams did I ever think I would be in that same place. But I was.

What is the “one thing that will never happen” to you? Share it in the comments, if you dare be so honest!

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Anxiety, Burnout, Depression, Failure, Pastor, Things that drain life | Leave a Comment

The Journey continues ….

October 31, 2007

“We pray that you’ll live well for the Master, making him proud of you as you work hard in his orchard. As you learn more and more how God works, you will learn how to do your work. We pray that you’ll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul—not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that he has for us.”

Colossians 1:10-12 (MSG)

“Pastor for Life” has been rolling around in my heart for a LLLOOOOONNNNGGGG time, at least it seems like a long time.

I am a Pastor. And sometimes, that’s weird!

One of those particular groups of people who is never supposed to burn out, but I did.
One of those people who are supposed to be resilient to weakness, but I wasn’t.
One of those professions that isn’t a profession, but it is.
One of those jobs that will never be 9 to 5, but honest pastors will say we sometimes wish it was.

The reality of this “calling”, “profession”, “job”, “ministry”, is that it is sometimes a monster that drains one of life instead of giving it. When I began to be honest about that and deal with it accordingly through my own burnout recovery, that’s when I began to find life in it. It was only then that I began to rediscover that Pastoring is what God made me to do, and I want to do it my whole life.

Pastor for Life = people who God has called to this thing that want to find life in it, rather than death.

Pastor for Life = people who long to do this successfully (we’ll talk ALOT about what that even means) for the rest of their lives.

This blog is for Pastors and/or former Pastors who have been down the roads of burnout, depression, failure and everything in between. It is also for Pastors and/or former Pastors who have NOT been down those roads and do NOT want to go down them. I will tell my story in the hopes it will help some, and that others might help me.

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Burnout, Church life, Depression, Life, Pastor, Things that drain life | 1 Comment

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