Pastors Packing Whose Power?

October 1, 2009

Here’s one interesting take on whose power we’re preaching and how …. click here!

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Church life, Church people, Communication, Community, Expectations, Leadership, Pastor, Physical health, Violence | Leave a Comment 

A Pastor or A Politician? The Unfolding of Governor Mark Sanford?

June 25, 2009

What’s the difference between a Pastor and a Politician? Both are highly public figures. Both represent something larger than themselves. There are similarities that are eerie and sometimes dangerous, and we could go on and on about them. But there are some important distinctions to make too.

When a Pastor fails morally, he or she most often loses everything, their job, their church, often their support system, kids often lose their friends from church or their school if a move is necessary; sometimes they even lose their marriage and family.

When a Politician fails morally, he or she may take a hit in their approval ratings, but rarely do they lose everything around them. Sometimes they do, but not often.

With this week’s news about the bizarre story of South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford being on a secret trip to Argentina having been about an adulterous affair he was having with a woman who lives there, he joins the ranks of a few politicians who have failed morally.

  • Just last week, Nevada Senator John Ensign admitted to an affair with a campaign staffer.
  • This generation’s most visible political figure to fail morally is President Bill Clinton, who denied having an affair with a White House staffer for seven months before he finally admitted it, all while he was President
  • Presidential hopeful John Edwards admitted to an affair a few months ago and it’s still making news.
  • New York Governor Eliot Spitzer was tough on prostitution in his state, and then lost his job when it was discovered he had been hiring them personally.

There are more examples, but that’s enough for now. Please note that this is NOT a post about whether or not Pastors or even Politicians should resign or lose their jobs as a result of adultery. I am not saying here that they should or shouldn’t.

We don’t yet know what will happen with the situation for Mark Sanford. His wife’s statement clearly says she is ready for reconciliation should Mark want it. That’s a good thing, and I hope it happens for the sake of their entire family.

But back to the question … what’s the difference between a Pastor and a Politician? We can mark several differences:

  • Pastors “work” for God; Politicians “work” for the constituents who voted for them.
  • Pastors represent something sacred; most seem to believe Politicians represent something pretty secular.
  • For the sake of “political correctness”, Pastors stand for the Church, while Politicians stand for the State, two institutions in America that have a weird relationship.

Let me boil this down. The point of this post has been primarily about the differences between Pastors and Politicians. But the real answer to the question, “What’s the difference between a Pastor and a Politician?” is, bottom line, NOTHING.

Part of our problem is that we make them out to be MORE THAN HUMAN. Certainly, there is a greater standard for spiritual leaders biblically, but we still make them out to be something more than flawed humans.

The more we can see that we are ALL flawed, imperfect human beings, the greater our ability to actually HELP each other when we fall, and help each other to stand again.

Your thoughts?

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Affairs, Brokenness, Burnout, Communication, Emotional health, Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, Expectations, Failure, Family, Leadership, Marriage, Pastor, Relationships, Tragedy, confession, deception, duplicity, influence, success | 2 Comments 

Redeeming the Secular

June 11, 2009

I know this post may cause some controversy, especially following my last post. However, when my wife encouraged me to read this column from the LA Times’ Chris Erskine, I immediately thought of how some of the things we lament in our culture can truly be redeemed. This is one of those things.

Read on, for those who are married, please enjoy, and feel free to leave any comments you feel appropriate. Really, it’s OK, ….. you’re not gonna hurt my feelings. I just think this is funny, and we could all use a good chuckle. Some may even be brave enough to try it, but please, ONLY with your spouse!

Baring his soul . . . and more

OK, sexting his wife was a snap decision and maybe he’ll regret it later.
By Chris Erskine
June 6, 2009

Keeping a relationship alive these days isn’t easy. So, in an effort to demonstrate my commitment, I just sexted my wife of 27 years — that is, I have sent her a revealing photo taken with my cellphone.

Love, says H.L. Mencken, is merely “a state of perceptual anesthesia.”

Now, I know my parents would never approve, but I don’t care anymore what they think. They’re not the boss of me.

And I don’t see what’s so wrong with sexting. It’s a declaration of love, much like a wedding ring or a ginormous dragon tattoo, from your hipbone to your neck. At least I didn’t do that.

In my case, I didn’t do anything bad to my body. I just lifted my Dodger T-shirt. Aim. Snap. Send.

Now, I know what you’re wondering. What happens when Posh eventually dumps you? Wonder if, out of spite, your wife distributes your sexy photo to her friends (the Yummy Mummies), and then the revealing photo makes its way all over the Internet and onto their Facebook pages, which they’ve suddenly flocked to like pigeons to popcorn? Facebook, the new merlot.

Anyway, suppose that happens, then what? You know how those Yummy Mummies are — they can’t keep a secret, especially not a sexy one.

You know, you just can’t worry about what other people think. I love Posh and she loves me. Besides, I’m tired of parents getting all judgmental over everything us kids do. My mom, she’s 84 now, won’t even let me get my tongue pierced. I said, “Mom, back off, OK? Gimme my space! I’m old enough to disgrace myself in any way I see fit!!!!”

Then I cried a little. Then I called Posh and we talked for, like, four hours.

::

If you’re not familiar with “sexting,” here’s the deal. Beginning a year or two ago, teenagers (usually girls) began sending naked or semi-naked cellphone photos of themselves to the loves of their lives.

At first blush — assuming anyone blushes anymore — this moronic gesture seemed mostly harmless. Sure, it compromised the poor girl’s dignity and any sense of self-worth. But that’s OK. Dignity and self-worth are now available at most major department stores and online.

The only permanent drawback to sexting is that a teenage girl can be a rather fickle creature. Sometimes, the love of her life turns out to be the love of her week.

So, in practice, when the girlfriends eventually dumped the boys, some of the jilted boys also forgot their sense of dignity and distributed the embarrassing shots to their friends, who sent it to their friends, till pretty much everyone in the world had it.

This, my friends, is how sexting got such a lousy, undeserved reputation.

This, I assure you, will never happen to me.

Aim. Snap. Send.

::

It’s not till now — yesterday morning, actually — that dads like me started sexting, meaning the trend may have run its course, who knows. That would be unfortunate. As with many things, once a dad does it, it’s never really cool again. Like when your old man started watching “Idol.”

Or Mom got her mitts on Facebook.

But let me just say this: Sexting rocks! Sexting is exciting! It made me feel all sexy again, and I didn’t even need to take any of those pills that can give you a big honkin’ headache and sometimes, occasionally kill you. All I had to do was act on impulse and lift my shirt.

I also included a little note: “YOU+ME 4-EVER!”

What did Posh do? Well, I sent the sext-message from the next room, and when Posh received it, she yelped a little, then gagged, then got all dizzy and passed out. It was like our honeymoon all over again. I kissed her to consciousness, then we went out for a nice lunch.

Aim. Snap. Delete.

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Communication, Family, Fun, Humor, Laughter, Life, Marriage, Relationships, Things that add life, confession | 1 Comment 

Ted Haggard, etc. ….

January 25, 2009

Having been through some pretty rough pastoral transitions over the years, I am saddened by this week’s news of further allegations of sexual misconduct in the situation surrounding Ted Haggard and New Life Church in Colorado Springs, Colorado.

I commend Pastor Brady Boyd for his forthright and pastoral handling of the situation. His is NO easy task. He deserves our support and prayers as he and the New Life leaders navigate what is sure to be a difficult week.

Along with the news of further misconduct, HBO is airing a documentary on Ted’s fall and the consequences. It airs Thursday night.

May God grace Pastor Boyd and New Life Church with His overwhelming presence this week as they continue to endure a glaring spotlight!

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Brokenness, Church life, Church people, Communication, Community, Emotional health, Expectations, Failure, Leadership, Pastor, Sex Addiction, Spiritual health, Tragedy, confession, deception, duplicity, grief | Leave a Comment 

Congregational Grief at Crossroads Cincinnati

December 18, 2008

The topic of how a church body handles grief and loss is HUGE for a Pastor. How a Pastor and his/her leadership handle it makes all the difference in the world.

News comes from Cincinnati this morning about a tragic accident that occurred during a Christmas presentation at Crossroads Church. You can read their statement here.

What is of particular interest and, I believe speaks VOLUMES about how they are handling the circumstance is the connection they are helping their church family make to something called, “Critical Incident Stress Management” (CISM for short). As a Police Chaplain, I’ve received training in CISM, which is an intentional process to help people (in my Chaplain field, it would primarily be first responders, though the process is also extremely helpful to witnesses, such as in this case) work through their shock and grief.

As a pastor having led through tragic events that deeply impact a church family, it’s so critical not only that the Pastor care for the church family and community, but that the Pastor also practice adequate self-care. To lead through times like this is deeply draining!

Read what they placed on their website about CISM here.

You can look further into CISM here.

I commend Crossroads Cincinnati for taking BOLD steps toward helping their community recover from this event! They will go far in seeing healing and recovery take place with their proactivity

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Church life, Communication, Community, Emotional health, Leadership, Mourning, Pastor, Personal Pace, Rest, Spiritual health, Suffering, Things that drain life, Tragedy, death, grief | Leave a Comment 

Pastor Wayne Cordeiro Returns To New Hope

October 29, 2008

This past weekend, Pastor Wayne Cordeiro returned to the pulpit for the first time since his recent heart surgery. You can read about that here.

This is a great opportunity to observe how a leader returns to ministry after a life-threatening crisis at the same time as determining how he will (or for some, IF he will) do life and ministry differently. For starters in this particular situation, it seems that at the very least, Wayne is coming back slowly.

You can watch the message he preached here called “Things We Must Do For Ourselves” in a very innovative manner. In the beginning, he mentions that the church will hear the message in this way over the next 4 weeks.

While New Hope has many campuses and they do much by satellite and live video feeds, whoever brings the message (primarily Wayne) almost always does so live at their main campus with FIVE services every weekend.

Wayne has already mentioned that his heart condition was somewhat the result of pushing too hard by preaching five services every weekend for many years. So …. what’s a mega-church (giga-church is a growing new term for churches of New Hope’s size) Pastor to do?

Well, Wayne’s first message back was a mixture of video and live speaking. The bulk of the message he actually preached on video, which was done very creatively.

It was well-mixed with Wayne speaking the message and some illustrative dramatic and musical elements. Wayne introduced the video live, segued with some live comments in the middle, went back to the video, finished the teaching with a live special song with the New Hope Worship Team and then Wayne brought the conclusion of the service live.

This, in my opinion, is a great example of what I call “Finding Your Personal Pace“. It will be interesting to see how Wayne and New Hope will progress from here. I have a hunch we will see some incredibly innovative and well-led ways for a Pastor to recover from a crisis in his life such as this.

Folks, you can be the most positive minded person in the world, but you can’t escape the reality of personal crisis happening even in the Pastor’s life. How we handle that crisis can mean everything for ourselves and our leadership.

Do you know of another Pastor who has had to handle personal crisis from the pulpit? If it’s OK to share it publically, feel free to do so in the comments. Let’s learn how to do this together, so we can do it better in the future!

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Church life, Communication, Creativity, Emotional health, Leadership, Message Preparation, Pace of life, Pastor, Personal Pace, Physical health, influence | 2 Comments 

Pastor Wayne Cordeiro Resting After Heart Surgery

October 4, 2008

Wayne Cordeiro, Pastor of New Hope Christian Fellowship (a Foursquare Church, the tribe I am part of) in Honolulu, Hawaii, is resting and recovering from significant heart surgery he underwent at Stanford Medical Center in Northern California.

Part of his statement reported, “My right artery was 95-99% blocked and two other places were 85-90% blocked. Nevertheless my surgeon was able to stretch the blockages and got in three stents, so I missed a bypass by a miracle. I am sore but so thankful for the “mulligan” I got from God.”

You can read his entire public statement to his congregation here. I commend his honesty and integrity in communicating with his church family.

He shared his personal story about encountering burnout at Willow Creek’s Leadership Summit in August of 2006, and is releasing a book about it soon called, “Dead Leader Running”.

Wayne pastors one of the largest and fastest growing churches in America, averaging over 10,000 people a weekend and only 13 years old, with no permanent facilities! I can’t keep track of how many services they run a weekend and how many campuses they do the at throughout Oahu.

I do know that Wayne is one of the healthiest Pastors I know of. His regimen of exercise and taking care of his physical body, let alone his spiritual devotional life, are well known. There are myriad numbers of Pastors that have been through his “Leadership Practicums” and untold numbers of churches that have been impacted by his “Life Journal” method of Scripture reading and journaling.

Not only do my prayer and concern go out to Wayne as he recovers (I don’t think he’d ever read this to know, and I don’t know him well personally), but God answers prayer whether people being prayed for know it or not, doesn’t He? I want to ask you to pray for him as well, would you?

The influence Wayne has stewarded so very well throughout his journey has been tremendous, and not one of us would want to see that impeded in any way! Pray for the saints of New Hope as well, that they would allow for this period of rest and recovery that Wayne needs.

We here at Pastor For Life wish Pastor Wayne a healthy recovery and blessings of peace and comfort to he and his entire family!

Posted by Paul | Filed Under Burnout, Communication, Leadership, Pace of life, Pastor, Physical health, Rest, influence | 8 Comments 

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